From Trauma Therapist to Queer-Spirit Guide: Safrianna Lughna's Journey

Safrianna Lughna is a retired trauma therapist who — with a little bit of unicorn magic, a wish and a dream — transformed into the Queer Spirit Guide, an international bestselling author, speaker, CEO, and transformational mentor. She is the CEO of Living Luna, a brand and social movement committed to uplifting the others through education, community, and wellness services.

Listen to the full episode HERE.

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SHOW RUNDOWN

[00:01:23] Safrianna Lughna on what she’s most passionate about

[00:01:43] Safrianna Lughna on why authenticity is such a big challenge for people

[00:02:42] Safrianna Lughna on when she first discovered her passion

[00:04:10] Safrianna Lughna on being a safe space for her students

[00:05:29] Safrianna Lughna on her transition from school teacher mental health worker

[00:07:54] Safrianna Lughna on stepping into her authentic self

[00:09:51] Safrianna Lughna on Hartley House

[00:12:37] Safrianna Lughna on getting counseling for her chronic illness

[00:15:45] Safrianna Lughna on starting Living Luna

[00:18:47] Safrianna Lughna on where the name Living Luna comes from

[00:20:10] Safrianna Lughna on on her partner Ikenna Lughna

[00:21:39] Safrianna Lughna on on describing a Polyamorous

[00:23:55] Safrianna Lughna on the ideal person to work with her

[00:25:25] Safrianna Lughna on on impacting people

[00:26:27] Safrianna Lughna on the common thread in people that work with her

[00:27:56] Safrianna Lughna on why diversity is such an important component of her work

[00:30:21] Safrianna Lughna on her reawakening ritual

[00:32:23] Safrianna Lughna on Soul Sugar

[00:34:13] Safrianna Lughna on the seasons framework

[00:36:58] Safrianna Lughna on energy leaks

[00:38:50] Safrianna Lughna on resolving energy leaks

[00:40:55] Safrianna Lughna on success stories of her clients

[00:43:09] Safrianna Lughna on the Living Lunas Zines

[00:45:13] Safrianna Lughna on the Living Luna podcast

[00:48:10] Safrianna Lughna on her Discord space

[00:49:39] Safrianna Lughna on her first poetry collection called A Woman's Work

[00:52:02] Safrianna Lughna on the bigger why

[00:53:54] Safrianna Lughna on the Passionistas community

[00:54:53] Safrianna Lughna on sacrificing yourself

[00:55:46] Safrianna Lughna on her dream for myself and for women and gender non-conforming people

FULL TRANSCRIPT

Passionistas: Hi, we're sisters Amy and Nancy Harrington, the founders of The Passionistas Project. We have created an inclusive sisterhood where passion driven women come to get support, find their purpose, and feel empowered to transform their lives and change the world. On every episode, we discuss the unique ways in which each woman is following her passions, talk about how she defines success, and explore her path to breaking down the barriers that women too often face.

Today we're talking with Safrianna Lughna, a retired trauma therapist who with a little bit of unicorn magic, a wish and a dream transformed into the Queer Spirit Guide, an international best selling author, speaker, CEO, and transformational mentor. She is the CEO of Living Luna, a brand and social movement committed to uplifting the others through education, community, and wellness services.

If you're joining us live here today, please feel free to drop any comments or questions for our guests in the chat, and we'll do our best to get them answered. Now, please welcome Safrianna Lughna. We're so excited to have you here.

Safrianna: Thank you. I'm so excited to be here. This has been a collaboration, I think, over a year in the making, and divinely timed that we're landing here now.

Passionistas: Absolutely. Absolutely. So, Safrianna, what are you most passionate about?

Safrianna: I am most passionate about living in a world where every single human being feels free and safe to be themselves completely and utterly in health and alignment. It's as simple as that.

Passionistas: I wish it was simple. I wish that most people felt that was simple.

Why do you think that's such a big challenge for people?

Safrianna: Well, unfortunately, you know, I have this background as a trauma therapist and my own trauma stories, and I think that it really stems back to generational trauma. And it's just been generations and generations and generations of trauma in the making that continue to make people feel like they have to stay small and be in this one size fits all box and it's really heartbreaking, but I look around and I see almost everybody trying to play by the same script, right? It's not that many people that boldly step out and choose to quote unquote defy the norms and rebel right now because there's such backlash by, I would argue, a vocal minority.

But they're so vocal that it's terrifying to step out.

Passionistas: Yeah, absolutely. So when did you first discover this passion? Was this something that interested you as a child?

Safrianna: I was just a creative child and spent a lot of time with nature. I'm very much a druid at heart, but I became a public school teacher. I kind of abandoned all my dreams.

I got very much wrapped up in productivity and hustle culture, and I went and became a public school teacher, and I witnessed A lot of the kids, but especially the queer kids, really, just really, really, really, really struggling. And it broke my heart and I didn't know what to do because they were talking to me because they saw me as a safe space.

But I couldn't do anything because I was a teacher, not a counselor. So I'm like, yeah, go off. So there was the transformation into being a therapist so I could help on a deeper level. And that's where I really started to unlock the passion. But then I realized I was still part of a system that was ultimately trying to homogenize people and make them do the one size fits all thing so they can just go out and continue to be little worker bees.

And so that's where I was like, hmm, this doesn't work because I'm fighting for them to be able to be authentically themselves, but society doesn't really think so. The system doesn't really think so, and I can't be myself like this either. So that's when I was like, okay, we're busting out and we're gonna do something completely different because I realized.

Me not being able to stand in my power and truth meant that I didn't believe other people could either on a fundamental level. So I, I broke free.

Passionistas: And why do you think you were a safe space for those kids? What was it like? Did you identify with them from your own experiences as a kid?

Safrianna: Yeah, so, to, in the simplest of terms, I even put up a poster in my room.

It was just a little poster that said, like, I'm a safe space for everyone, and it had, like, a rainbow and, like, you know, different skin tones and things like that, and I was one of the few teachers that was bold enough to put that in my room, and there was backlash, and I had to deal with all of that, but I stood fast in it, and I made sure that I kept displaying that I was a safe space, and it was really interesting, because at the time, I was not out as a queer person, um, and, and so I was kind of going through my own identity thing and then hold, again, huh, holding space for other people to be able to step safely into their identity while not allowing myself to do it. Uh, but, you know, I was the teacher that fought for those kids and so they, they kept seeing me saying, no, I'm going to be an inclusive space for all of, all of these children.

Like, you're not going to convince me otherwise. Uh, so I think that it was just, I was willing to fight for them. And they witnessed that, even if I wasn't quite willing to fight for myself at that time.

Passionistas: So tell us about that transition being a school teacher to going back to school, getting your master's, getting into mental health.

Safrianna: There was not really much of a transition. Uh, you know, part of what I do now is help people break free from hustle culture because I was the, oh my gosh, like the standing example in the dictionary of overachiever.

I was working full time as a teacher, which anybody who knows a teacher, you know, that that's more than a full time job because you're not off when the, when the school day ends. You've got papers to grade and lessons to write and all that. Um, so I was doing that while going to grad school, while parenting in an unhealthy relationship, while doing my internship for a year or two.

There was a, there was a year there where I don't, I don't know how I made it through, but, uh, the transition was really abrupt when I made the leap because, uh, I got my degree, so I did all that. I did all that gauntleting and packing my whole degree and internship and working into three years. And then there were a ton of issues happening with the principal at our school at that time, a lot of misogyny and sexism and sexual harassment, and I spoke up against it.

And there was a whole to do, and I said, I'm not doing this anymore, and I immediately retired in the middle of the year. And transition to being a therapist. So when I'm done, I am done. When I'm like, there's no fixing this, you want to sink this ship, I'm like out. So I left in the middle of the year and I kind of warned my kids like, you're going to have a long term sub and this is what's going to happen.

And it was really funny because years later, several of those students found me and came to me as a therapist because they were like, I remembered you were going into therapy and I remember how much you were a safe space for me in school.

Passionistas: Wow. That's cool. That must have felt so good.

Safrianna: It was so, it felt good.

It felt weird because of course then I was like, Oh God, what are the ethics of this? And I had to like look in and do paperwork and make sure that it was clear the relationship divides. And that was another reason that I'm like, I'm so out of the system anymore because why can't we just be people with one another?

Like, why can't we agree maturely how to navigate something together? Why?

Passionistas: Yeah. Yeah. So, what was the point for you, personally, where you decided to kind of step into your authentic self, and and was there something that spawned you on to do that?

Safrianna: Uh, well, if anyone out there is an astrologer and, or enjoys astrology, uh, my Saturn return on the day of my Saturn return, and I didn't know this until years later, as I was learning more about astrology, I met my now partner, spouse, partner, I have more than one partner, but I met my now spouse, And they are non-binary, and they ripped the lid right off my willingness to hide my queer identity.

And it was funny, because even they, like, were like, I, you know, I'm still a little in the closet in these certain ways, and I was like, like, no, you have brought my heart and soul to the surface. So, that was the day of my Saturn return, uh, and shortly after meeting them, uh, I was just stepping into a new level of self-love, and I was with them.

They worked at a church at the time. I had gone with them to the church. And I was standing in the bathroom and this is a bougie church, very bougie church. It's got huge wall to wall mirrors in the bathroom and I'm standing there washing my hands and I looked up and I made eye contact with myself and I went, you are the woman that I'm in love with.

And that was the moment. And I have a poem written about it. It's in my poetry book. Like, that was the moment of my life where everything shifted. Yes, my partner Ikenna, like, opened that. Like, hey, you're really actually queer and you're never going to be able to put this back in the box, right? You can't.

But also, I am the person I need to be anchored into. The truth of me, and they were able to reflect me back to me in a way that no one ever else had. And so it was just a really special connection and friendship that allowed me to soften and then for me to see myself.

Passionistas: That's absolutely beautiful. I love that imagery.

Um, so you were a counselor at the Hartley House. So talk a little bit about that and, and what you, what important lessons you learned there.

Safrianna: Oh my gosh. Hartley House is honestly one of the most amazing organizations that I have ever known. And I'm actually, I'm trying to work, work more stuff with them in the future because their mission is just so powerful.

So, they're a center for survivors of domestic violence, sexual assault, and human trafficking. And it happens that I am those, those people. I am a survivor of most of those things and have that lived experience. So, working there was, Absolutely eye opening to me because I was not only doing deep healing work with myself through seeing it in others, because I had to process me to help them process them, but not take up space.

So that was an interesting dynamic, but oh my gosh, like I learned there how much just the power of compassion can do for people, and how just like being there when people are going through a hard time can make a world of difference. And, you know, I worked hotline there for a little bit before I started my internship, so I got the, you know, the in the middle of the crisis people that I was working with.

I also had people coming in for like emergency services, and then I went on to become a counselor there and was seeing people on going and. I mean, I wouldn't be the healer that I am today without all of that, because when you can hold space for the deepest of relational trauma and you can show up and not shy away from it, like, you can do anything.

If you can go into those shadows and, like, keep your sense of self and love and hope alive, you can do just about anything. And that job taught me what a working environment should really be like. I would still be there if it wasn't for cost of living and it being a nonprofit and that's why now I fight for, like, I'm a champion for not just workers rights but better pay and to make the system realize that you can't, like, we can't eat breadcrumbs for forever and be happy little workers right?

And that's not what that job tried to do at all. They really were the most supportive environment, but still couldn't help me sustain myself. And the reason that I ended up leaving was chronic illness, because my chronic illness just got too great. And that was a learning curve, too. Like, oh my gosh, holding everyone else's trauma and not making space for myself.

Of course, I was in therapy and whatnot, but not really making space for myself was eating me alive inside. So, that was a hard learning.

Passionistas: So what did you do for yourself to, you said you're, you know, were in counseling, but how did you kind of get through that time? Because that sounds really difficult.

Safrianna: Yeah.

So, as I kind of came to terms with my chronic illness and not just like, I'm going to be a chronic illness warrior for the rest of my life, but rather I want to see what I can do to actually lift this. Like, I got really curious and So I started to do really deep breath work. I signed up for like a breath work apprenticeship that was a year long and every single day we would breathe for 30 minutes in community and hold each other's pain together and just like show up.

And that started to soften me. Let me start to take up space. I also realized that traditional talk therapy was not working for me anymore. So because I just talked, I talked it to the edge. And, you know, even as a therapist, like I know this, and as a healer, I extra know this, which is why I'm a holistic wellness person now, is you can't just do one layer of it.

You can't just do the mental work, you can't just do the physical work, like you have to do this combo. And so, the breathwork really started to bring me into my body in a new way. I started doing float therapy, which is where you get into like the sensory deprivation pod and you shut the lid and you're in the dark floating in water.

And that was, uh, studies have been, have shown that that's very effective for fibromyalgia, which is what I was diagnosed with. So I started doing that and I started working with my, just my body more. My whole body, full body awareness, body scanning, what am I doing nutritionally? How am I hydrating? You know, I got curious about Ayurveda.

I worked with an Ayurvedic practitioner to understand the damage that had been done to my gut because of my trauma. Which is huge. Oh my gosh, like if you have had trauma, you probably have gut issues. That is something that survivors of especially childhood abuse, a lot of them have chronic stomach problems.

But anyway, I like I hit it from lots of different angles, and I switched from talk therapy to art therapy. So I started actually using expressive arts, which was very interesting because I had trauma around my art from my childhood, but she just cracked me open and, and doing art. I did about a year of intensive art therapy and expressed all of the stuff that had been bottled up through image and, uh, journaling and just color and shape.

And that just started to show me an entirely new layer of it. So ultimately, it was getting curious, not doing what I always done and being willing to try new things. See what worked and wasn’t working and be willing to acknowledge that I was in pain and not try to completely avoid it, but also move towards creative solutions to see if I could break it up more, right? Like, remove some of the pain from my body. And it's still an ongoing process, but I'm much better than I used to be.

Passionistas: Wow. So glad to hear that. That's amazing. Um, so now what, What made you decide to go out and share all of this with the world by finding, by founding Living Luna?

Safrianna: So somewhere in my deep dive, I really started to deep dive what I call my blueprint over the last couple of years. So your blueprint includes things like your astrology, your human design, your, uh, natural number, which is something that not many people know about, which is a physiological body based archetype And just like all of these inner workings, personality tests, like you name it, just to start to get curious about myself.

And what was a very interesting element of my design in my astrology and my human design was like, you're meant to go live this out loud because that's what actually helps more people. And I had this aha moment, I was like, Okay, in my therapy room, one of the most effective things that ever worked in, in the clinical work that I was doing, right, was literally the tiniest toe tip in the water of therapeutic self-disclosure.

I would just say something to the effect of, Because I would feel their shame boiling to the surface of something, and I'd have gone through it too. And I would be like, you don't have to be ashamed of this. So I would just drop in the simplest like, I just want you to know, I have been through something almost exactly the same or very similar to this.

And I am not judging you at all. And you don't need to judge yourself. And, and it was always because they saw me as an authority. They're like, well, you're better than me. You know, that's their belief, is this therapist is more put together and better than me. And I would just say, I just want you to know I survived this thing too.

You're not alone. And I would say that, and all of a sudden they would skip ahead like six months in therapy, and I'd be like, but why am I wasting my time trying to be this like cold clinical, I'm not a real person, because the system has taught me to be that, and it's not that I'm like, I also hear a lot of stories, I just want to put this out there, of therapists taking over the therapy room, and Telling their clients things that they shouldn't be telling them because it's not therapeutically appropriate.

And so it was that fine tuning, just this little bit of self-disclosure. So I'm like, what could I be doing if I just lived out loud? And then the people who see my story go, oh, well, I want to work with her because I know she can help me go really deep into this shadow. You can't do that in therapy. Like there's so many ethical things and there's this fear that you're going to lose your license.

And I mean, It makes sense. There are some people doing real damage out there, but I just was like, I can do bigger things. So Living Luna was my means to begin speaking more publicly and just openly through our podcast, through blogs, through my books. Like, and I had to let go of those systems in order to do that.

Passionistas: And where does the name Living Luna come from?

Safrianna: Well, our last name, my partner and I, is Luna L U G H N A, which comes from Lunasa, Luna means autumn in Scots Gaelic, uh, and I have Druid, Druid roots and whatnot, so when we chose our family name, we chose that. And we originally founded the brand as Living Lughna, spelled with our last name, and everyone was like, what's Lughna?

What's? We were like, okay, clearly not the right name. What else could we do? So, we were like, well, it's pronounced Luna, and we're big moon lovers, and we just adore, oh, it's recognizing my hand signals here. Uh, it, I just adore the moon. I do moon rituals. I, I see myself as a moon babe, like, I don't know, I call her Grandmama Moon.

So it made sense for our brand imagery to go with the moon and it goes with our last name. But it also, fun fact, is an acronym. So the LUNA is capital in our, our brand because it is an acronym and it stands for Loving, Unashamed, and Nurturing Authenticity. So that is at the root of, like, what we do and who we are.

Passionistas: That's beautiful. So you've mentioned Ikenna a few times. She's your co-founder and your partner. So tell us a little bit about Ikenna.

Safrianna: Yeah, so Ikenna is just an incredible, wonder filled soul. They really bring me into my awe and wonder and everyday experience. They are a musician, uh, they're an audio, audio engineer, so they do all of our our sound stuff for podcasts, like they're just, they are a creative powerhouse. They do little comics, little guys that explore like shame and fear and some of our heavier emotions. They're also a licensed clinician. They specialize in working with neurodivergent adults and children. And we met on a dating site, we met at an art gallery, and the rest is history.

We have, uh, been together many years now and been through so much, you know, as I very briefly mentioned, we're both polyamorous, so we have other relationships. We actually don't even live together anymore, but we still have this marriage and this partnership. And, like, our story just, I guess, boggles people's minds because they see what's possible.

Like, when we don't fit ourselves to these conventional Definitions, What's Possible. And Ikenna and I have both been willing to really explore that together, which has just been, it's just a beautiful partnership.

Passionistas: Yeah, that's amazing. It's so, so beautiful. You know, I think people don't understand what Polyamorous relationships are, and I know even on your website, you, you speak to that.

So do you mind kind of explaining to people who might not know what, what that means?

Safrianna: Absolutely and there's a lot of misconceptions in even like the non-monogamous communities about what polyamory is so thank you for the question.

Polyamory simply means that one is open to or in multiple committed romantic relationships, or committed is really the keyword because there are asexual and aromantic people in the world that don't feel sexual or romantic attraction, but still want a partnership so polyamory is sometimes something that really works well with that. But polyamory is just non monogamy, but still commitment. It's the commitment of monogamy.

In a non-monogamous relationship, and that can look like one person being in a relationship with two different people, it could look like a triad, it could look like, in our case, uh, Ikenna and I are in a relationship, we're married, we're legally married, and I have a boyfriend, long term boyfriend partner, And Ikenna has a long term girlfriend partner.

The boyfriend and the girlfriend are not in a relationship, and they're not, and we don't cross partners. So that's one configuration. You'll see all kinds of polyamorous, uh, configurations that we, we joke and call them either polycules because they're like molecules with different connections, or like constellations where some stars are connected and others aren't.

But yeah, polyamory is just a beautiful word for loving relationships that are committed to one another in a non-monogamous fashion. So I hope that was a good overview. It's different than, the biggest misconception people have is that polyamory equals an open relationship and an open relationship is like you're open to sleeping with other people or you know, doing certain things with other people but you're not in a committed relationship with them.

That is what a lot of people think polyamory is, but poly means many or more than one, and amory means love. So it is multiple loves.

Passionistas: That makes total sense. Thank you. That's a great explanation. I do think a lot of people just don't understand and don't feel safe to ask. So thank you for that. Yeah. Um, so in your work, who is the ideal person for you to work with?

Safrianna: At this point in my career, I'm really working with the visionary leaders. I am working with people who are running teams, who are building businesses, who are principals in schools, who are, you know, change makers on boards. I'm working with leaders who know that they can make more impact if they step into who they really are.

Like my favorite all time client, queer woman sitting on an all man board in an electronics company, and she was not showing up as who she was. She was pretending she was married to a man. She pretending she was straight. She was not fighting for her values at the board meetings at all.

And after our work together, she started, like the luncheons were suddenly being catered by women of color and, you know, local, um, kids were making products for them for fun and like doing fundraisers and like she got to start going out in the community, showing up at who as who she was and, you know, making a bigger impact in the company, making them more money because she was a, saving the money on frivolous, silly things that a whole board of white men was spending money on, right? And, uh, then actually, like, living the values out in the community, getting community involvement. And that's, I want to work with people that are making those kinds of changes because I really believe in the ripple effect.

Passionistas: What does that mean to you? You believe in the ripple effect.

Safrianna: So if I, if in my career, in my life, in my showing up and being here on earth, I can deeply impact three people, And those three people go on to make a deep impact on three more people. And each of those people make an impact on three more people.

I've done art about this before. I actually have an art piece that's dots on a grid lighting each other up. And that's what it's like. And I know I've already made an impact on more than three people. So yay, me, mission accomplished. Like, let me go write my books now. No, I love, I love working with leaders that can then influence the entire culture of the company that they're building or how they're, you know, making profits, how they're showing up in the world and inviting other people to be authentically them because every single person that shows up in authenticity invites another person to show up in authenticity.

So that's the ripple effect and I'm here for it.

Passionistas: And so what's the common thread that you find when people come to work with you?

Safrianna: Honestly, the common thread is that these are people that have been really high achieving in the past, uh, not all of my clients are queer, and it's interesting because, you know, I identify as the Queer Spirit Guide, that's my fun little title, but a majority of my clients are not actually queer.

They came to me because they're like, I know you're accepting, and like, you're gonna show up and see all of me, and you're gonna be okay with it, um, but I, I think that, uh, Oh no, I just totally derailed my train of thought there. Can you say the question to get in reorient me? The common thread that you said.

The common thread, yes, because it's not, it's not their identity. It's not that. It's, they are change makers who unfortunately have burned out so bad that they are not able to make the impact because they're tired, they're sick, they don't want to show up to work, they're tired of doing what they're doing.

And, they also are allies, like, that's, that is the thread. They're at least allies with everybody being able to be who they are. We've got that in common. And then they're like, I want to make a bigger impact in the world, but I can't even, like, See myself.

Passionistas: Yeah. So you work with, you know, I know you're saying right now, maybe your client base is not necessarily of a specific background, but it's, you were, you intentionally work with a diverse group of people, but why is diversity such an important component of your work?

Safrianna: Oh, it's kind of everything who I am. So in that archetype system that I briefly mentioned that's your natural number, it's a body based. I'm a natural number nine, and nines hold the picture of unity. So we're like, everybody is a part of the larger whole and diversity, our individuality is actually our greatest like human superpower.

And when we celebrate the diversity of everybody, and we show up and we listen to each other around the table, like, anything can happen, all the dreams can come true, and everybody can be acknowledged, but we, again, try to shove everybody in one box, and that just, it breaks my heart. I was always the person as a kid that went out of my way to befriend the weird kid, or the kid who everybody thought was going to be violent, or the kid who, Uh, my very, one of my very first friends was the only Black or African American student in the entire school, and she moved in in the middle of the year, and nobody would go up to her because she looked so different.

So she was my bestie, right? Like, I just always saw differences, like, I'm curious, like, not in a you need to teach me about you kind of way, because trying to get other cultures to do the emotional labor of making us to learn about them is not what we're here to do, but just to get curious about them as a person.

And every time I get curious about people as a person, I realize how alike and the same we really are. So, diversity's always been just, I guess, top of mind. I, I, when people ask me that question, I'm like, I don't even know how to answer that because I've never, ever thought of a one, one size fits all world.

Passionistas: Yeah, we feel the same way. It's like it's, it's ingrained in us, and it's such an obvious way to live. But I think there are people out there that I know there are people out there that still don't get it. And so it's always interesting to try and Explain to them why it's so important.

Safrianna: Yes. Oh, my gosh.

Well, yeah, I have a lot of a lot of deep thoughts on that. Yeah, just how much damage we do to one another and how much trauma there is. And, you know, we can do better. And that means seeing one another for who we really are.

Passionistas: 100%. So tell us about your reawakening ritual and what that entails.

Safrianna: Oh, these are some of my favorite because a lot of times the reawakening rituals are, are a one off and I don't work with them again because they're not looking for ongoing work, they're just kind of looking for a zhuzh, as I like to call it, right, zhuzhing up their energy.

So my reawakening rituals are these beautiful, Completely curated to the individual so I have them fill out a form and they tell me exactly what they like if they have any spiritual traditions that we need to honor. Uh, you know, what they If they like cards, if they don't, if they want to do EFT tapping, if they want to do a shamanic soul retrieval, they kind of get to pick and choose of all of the gifts I've developed over the years. And it's in a five step process. So through that ritual, we're really coming back home to the soul. We're clearing out any blockages.

And then we're remembering the deep dream that they want to be living in that moment and allowing them to step back. Back into that, and again, it's like completely varied. Sometimes we'll do, uh, you know, energy clearing session, then we'll do an oracle reading, and then I'll do some energy work in their field, and then we do a vision board at the end.

Sometimes it's like almost entirely meditation, because that's what they want. Sometimes they just need to talk, but we use the framework as they talk through, and I reflect back. Uh, so they're very, they're rituals, they're one of a kind, they're never the same, and everybody feels reawakened like they see themselves again at the end and usually, usually I do get an email a couple weeks later like, Oh my god, what just happened?

Like, I cried for five days and now I feel like a whole new human. One client comes in, she goes, do you warn your clients about what could happen within days? Like, yes, yes, you need to drink water, you need to rest, like, because we bring it all to the surface and we look at the shadow and then we clear what we need to clear and we move forward.

They're really fun.

Passionistas: That's amazing. And you also have a program called Soul Sugar. Mm hmm. What's that?

Safrianna: Oh, so this is my ooey gooey getting into your blueprint and like really seeing who you are. So Soul Sugar was the name that dropped in as to what we're kind of finding, which is again that like, what makes your life sweet?

What makes your soul really sing with joy, right? And so it is a three to six month program. Again, I factor flexibility into everything I do because neurodivergent and trauma informed, uh, and chronic illness informed. So sometimes people need more wiggle room. But basically we have seasonal sessions. So we have a two sessions for each of the four seasons.

And so we're looking at your life through the metaphor of that. We also have some specialized sessions where we're on, we're unlocking your blueprint. We're getting into your design, talking about all of what, is interworking as well as that body based system, that natural number. So we do like a physiological test, um, to determine that.

And literally this program is for the people who want to go deep. They want to go really, really deep with somebody who is not going to shy away from the trauma, who's not going to try to bypass, who's, but also is not going to let them swim in the trauma. Because we're like, okay, we see the pattern.

That's what we're really looking at in Soul Sugar, is your patterns, your cycles, so that you can break those limiting ones and step into that impact. So it's really for people who have already done a little bit of post traumatic growth. You don't need ongoing therapy necessarily, or you have a therapist, but you want to go even deeper into the, the woo, the cosmic, the blueprint, um, or just the deep dive.

We work on boundaries, we work on values, we work on you actually living that sweet life that you want to live.

Passionistas: So talk a little bit about the seasons framework and what that is and how you came up with it.

Safrianna: I love acronyms. I love acronyms and I am so into the elements and the seasons and I wish I had sketchbooks sitting here in front of me because I would show you some of my literal seasons sketches because everything in life metaphorically can be viewed through the lens of the passing of the seasons.

So the framework itself is all of the things I've learned through the course of being a spiritual teacher. So I've been doing rituals since I was 19. Uh, I've gotten an apprenticeship with like, somebody who'd been doing pagan stuff for years and learned from her, went on to do stuff in other communities.

So it's taking what I've learned from spiritual work, what I've learned from being a therapist, what I've learned from being a teacher, and what I've learned through the breath work and the more integrative medicine studies I've done, and really get to what are the main foundations of what ends up holding us back or, you know, keeps us from living that sweet life.

So seasons stands for stories, energy, aligned actions, season of life. So season of life is that larger season of life that you're in, but also what's happening and the earth around you. 'cause that impacts you and people don't usually talk about that. Uh, and then ownership needs and self-care. So we look at each of these domains through the program.

I actually have developed, um, for each of the seasons as we're going through the sets of two sessions, you also get a survey. And that survey lets you really map your data. And so we get this big picture view of your personal energy cycles, how you view yourself at different times, and whatnot over the course of that three to six months.

So, I'm very much, because I have that clinical background, I do know how valuable data is. And a lot of us will get into a coaching program, uh, and we, Don't take notes or we don't really pay attention to the deeper work that's happening and then we finish the program and there was no integration and we just move on and we go right back into the old pattern.

So this program is really like a break your, your negative cycles once and for all because we're going to view them, we're going to make plans around them, and then you leave the program and you don't need to keep coming back to me because we've already made the plan. And you can get other supports along the way as you need them, right?

And that's part of what we plan for. So it's very holistic and seasons are very holistic, like it's the flow of life that so many of us ignore.

Passionistas: One of the things you mentioned in relation to Soul Sugar on your site is energy leaks. What are those and how do you address those with people?

Safrianna: Oh gosh, energy leaks can, can come in many forms.

The probably biggest and most egregious are boundary issues where it's like, I have a friend who messages me at all hours of the day, and rather than telling this friend, like, hey, this isn't working for me, you know, I am not going to respond. You can message, but I'm not going to respond. If they're instead holding a pattern where they're going to give away that energy anyway, because they don't want to, they don't want to buck the system, they don't want to stand up and have the boundary, that's an energy leak.

They're giving away that energy, they're hemorrhaging that energy without taking a stand for it. So I really help people like. Identify where they're not standing in their power. They're checking their emails all days of , you know, all, all, all the time. They are not taking breaks. They are giving too much in a relationship.

They're not receiving enough out of a contract. Their job is sucking the life out of them because. This boss, you know, whatever it is, it's these places we're giving up our literally our energy, right? So if you're giving up your time, that's you giving up your energy. If you're giving up your manual labor and you're not getting anything back, like that's giving up energy.

So It's going to be completely variable, but we all have energy leaks. An example could be if you're a service provider and you have a client that's not messaging you back and you're like, is the client coming back? That can be an energy leak because you have a contract that's open. That you don't know if it's going to get closed, right?

So really getting curious about where we are holding our energy, kind of in reserve even, without recognizing that that is then not able to be used for something else. That's, that's energy leaks.

Passionistas: So then what? Do you recognize the energy leaks? How do you resolve that?

Safrianna: Oh, then we get into boundary work.

And this is where, like, a lot of people call me their cheerleader and I, I've had so many clients independently, like, I started actually saying it because I had so many people say, you know, I was thinking of doing this the other day and then it was like I had a pocket Safrianna say no. Like, they've had, I've had independent clients tell me that they have this experience of my voice chiming in their ear being like, That's not for you, uh, but I'm like the number one cheerleader, so I, with that education as a trauma therapist, I've also studied nonviolent communication, I've studied a lot of methods of communication, so I will walk with you and we will practice the boundaries if you need to.

It's one of the fun things about Soul Sugar is my clients also have that pocket guidance, they can reach out anytime and like, Get on the spot feedback. So, like, I'll have a client say, hey, I'm realizing, you know, I need to talk to my roommate about this and how this isn't working. Can I just, like, practice the wording with you?

And I will give them an objective. You know what? You did a great job being as neutral as possible here at this point. It is on them how they react, right? A lot of times people just want that reassurance that, like, I'm not being mean by drawing the boundaries. So, I help a lot with, like, wording of boundaries.

I have tons of handouts that I can give when people need it, like literal boundary scripts that can be filled out. Uh, you know, whatever tools my clients need, fortunately, I probably have it from my Mary Poppins grab bag of being a teacher and a therapist and a spiritual guide. So, and if I don't have it, I like to make stuff.

That's the teacher in me. I'm always making new stuff. You're practically perfect in every way. I wouldn't say that, but I'm pretty, I'm pretty happy with me and where I'm at and where I've come from, because I didn't used to be, if I'm perfectly honest. And that's, that's my biggest passion is helping people just love themselves.

You can feel it. With fresh eyes. You can feel it. Thank you.

Passionistas: What's, tell us some success stories of people that you've worked with.

Safrianna: Oh my gosh, yeah, so that one client is always going to be my shining example because she went out and started to make just a beautiful impact in the world. Another client of mine was really struggling, you know, she was very passionate about her Catholic faith.

And she chose me, the Queer Spirit Guide, to work with, first of all, I loved that. And she was one of the ones that said, I knew you weren't going to judge me. But her Catholic faith and her passion for making medicine out of hemp were conflicting so much, and I'm sure you can imagine why, right? There's a lot of stigma around hemp and cannabis.

And this woman makes some of the deepest medicine imaginable. And she went out from our work and started her own company. And I just like, was like, wow. You know, we worked through the religious trauma and moved past that guilt into like, this is my medicine to offer the world. Another client was, literally came to me because he wanted to enter a polyamorous relationship and finally be able to do that, you know, successful career in IT.

Like, my clients are, this is why I can't niche down to one thing because my clients are so varied, but they're leaders or visionaries in different areas. But he just wanted to be able to, admit how he felt about people and have the autonomy to explore that. And we worked together to achieve boundaries and his relationships and communicate what he needed to communicate while being respectful of people's time and and needs.

So I do all kinds of work 'cause I have all kinds of expertise, but. And that's that, like, that's the therapist training, right? Therapists don't niche initially, um, but from there, that passion to really help people just whatever is missing in their life to step to that next level of truth, because some people already have it in the career, and they need it in the relationship.

Some people have it in the relationship, but they don't want to show up in the career, right? So balancing and figuring out how do we show up authentically in every area of your life.

Passionistas: Beautiful. Um, tell us about the digital magazines and newspapers you've done called Living Lunas.

Safrianna: Yeah, the Living Lunas Zines, I call them, are super fun, and I try to do about two a year, so hopefully we'll have one coming up in the next few months here.

And that is, if you can't tell, I'm a little bit ADHD and in my human design I'm a manifesting generator. So what that means is I am full of ideas and passion. And art and writing and self expression are very important to me. So the zine was a way to ignite my hobby of just doing like creative newspapers, because I'm a super nerd and I used to do them for video games.

And I was like, okay, I was cute in my 20s when I had the time to do this for video games, but like, how do we bring it to the world in a meaningful way? And so the zine was born to share mostly fellow entrepreneurs art and writings and articles, and then have like a a catalog of those providers at the end with their bios and whatnot.

So it's a way to like have them show up first as the artist and then if people are intrigued to then be able to go click. The zines are all digitally interactive so literally everywhere that an author or a photographer or whatever appears you can click and go right to their page. And it was just a fun way to network and really showcase how creative people are because a lot of entrepreneurs are out there, you know, doing coaching or running big businesses and behind closed doors they're doing really cool things that they're not sharing and so I want them to share those things because it humanizes them.

Passionistas: We, that's amazing. We, uh, we keep saying we're going to do a Passionistas talent show for that very reason. I love that. Everybody's got these amazing side skills and projects. And it's like, we need to do a talent show. I'm here for it. Believe me, you will be top of the list of people. Um, so tell us about the Living Luna podcast and why you started it and what people can expect when they listen.

Safrianna: So the podcast happened because I, it was 2022 timelines are weird. At any rate, I was sitting at church and we do, um, we do like prayer requests at the end of the service. It's a unity church and such a sweet and amazing community. And I was like, hi, um, I'm still in my therapy practice at this time. I was like, I have a prayer request because I just, I want to get my voice out there in a bigger way, and I don't know how.

And the Reverend herself was like, you need to start a podcast, Safrianna. So what did we do? Uh, Ike and I got their old audio equipment from college. And because that was their undergrad was audio engineering. And we got in the closet, literally in the closet in my office. And we recorded the first season.

And the first season talks a lot about, our journey of coming to a place where we can talk openly, our queer journeys, a little bit about polyamory, and just a lot of authenticity based topics, a lot of the taboo stuff that people don't want to talk about. So that's what you can expect in Season 1. Season 2, I was very deeply in the coaching world at this point, and like, networking left and right, and I was like, everybody does guest podcasts, let's do a guest podcast.

So Ike and I did a guest season, and we learned a lot. We learned a lot a lot about what is ours to do and what's not ours to do, and I love to promote other businesses and like cheer people on, but we didn't get to talk as much about the juicy topics in that format. So we're returning in season three to our roots, um, with the Living Lunas Podcast and doing just Ikenna and I, and we're going to be talking all about relationships, especially polyamory and like advanced.

Communication and just interpersonal stuff and attachment styles. But on top of the Living Lunas Podcast, we have some branches as well. So I run guest podcasts called Soul Connection Calls through Living Luna. There are conversations just like this one where we're just kind of talking about different topics.

And then I do a Line and Shine series, which is an EFT tapping with another practitioner, and we just tap and we talk through um, issues. And I have another series called The Inner Tapestry, where we unpack Blueprint stuff and all kinds of woo stuff with one of my very, very woo woo friends. So if you check out like our, our creative suite, we have a little bit of something for everybody, uh, in those various podcast platforms.

Passionistas: That's excellent. And you also have a Discord where people can come in and check in for quick guidance. Is that part of your bigger program? Your social?

Safrianna: No, the Discord is completely free and open to anybody who wants to come hang out. Discord is, I liken it back to AIM, AOL Instant Messenger back in the day, or something like that, because it's sort of a hybrid between, um, like a Facebook Messenger back and forth.

But also, like, a Facebook group, because there's channels and whatnot that you can go post in, so it's a very active platform. You can be on your phone, you can be on your computer, app or browser, and it's just our social community. So, we have nerds in there, we have starseeds, we have business owners, we have writers, we have people who just really love to razz on each other's astrology.

There's a running joke on our server right now that it's run by a sagittarius because almost everybody that joins is a sagittarius. Like we, it's the place to come to literally hang out and like have a supportive community where you know you can be authentic. And what I love about Discord is it very much allows for digital boundaries so you can select which channels you want to see by clicking a little emoji button that we have assigned to the different channels.

So if you're like, I'm really into art and I want to share pet pics. And that's all I want to do? Then you can select just that, and that's what you'll be able to participate in, so it's just the place to hang out, and I love meeting new people and inviting them into the social circle.

Passionistas: That's fantastic. And tell us a bit about your poetry work.

Safrianna: Oh, yes. So I just released my first poetry collection called A Woman's Work in May of 2024, and I have another poetry book called Daddy's Girl coming later this year and Daddy's Girl is my relationship with my late father and all the stuff there.

So if you have daddy issues, stay on the lookout for that one because it's going to unpack all of that. But A Woman's Work is, uh, told in three arcs. It's The Butterfly Journey. The Butterfly Journey is my core soul symbolism is what I would call it. Like, the butterfly is my soul symbolism. And, uh, in each of the arcs, it goes through a different time of my life.

It's a pretty heavy book. It is not for you to read if you are easily triggered by any stretch of the imagination. But it also doesn't deep dive on the trauma. It just expresses that it happened. Uh, but I explore being a child and all of the neglect and abuse and how that made me see myself and then we go into how that impacted my relationships with a lot of really emo love poetry.

Uh, and then we get into the reclamation arc where I'm coming into myself and really reclaiming myself. That poem I mentioned, um, The Woman I'm in Love With is in that, that arc and everybody that's read it is like, oh man, we were, we were getting real deep there but then we came up out and I have so much more hope.

Whatnot now. So poetry is really how I unpack the deeper stuff that's even hard to put like regular words to and to express the profound emotions that so many of us bypass when we've experienced these things. And I have been influenced by poets my whole life. Maya Angelou, Andrea Gibson are some of my favorites.

But. Poetry. Poetry saves lives. It really, really does. And I was so excited to finally publish something that was my poetic work. And who knows? Um, who knows what the future will bring? But I do know, with regards to hosting retreats, that I see myself doing some poet and writer specific retreats in the future.

So, that's exciting.

Passionistas: Excellent. So what's the question about your work that we're not asking you?

Safrianna: Oh, you want me to see my blind spot? That is my worst thing. That's why I'm always like, responding with other people. Oh, I would say, you know, the question that you aren't asking is, is the bigger why? Why, why on a bigger scale?

We're doing all of these things in my company and like, I have services and I have books, but why? Why am I doing those things?

Passionistas: So why are you doing those things?

Safrianna: Okay, thank you. I need to respond to someone else. Why I'm doing these things is, it goes back to that I, I am fighting for a world where everyone can show up authentically as themselves.

And that means that we have to bring to light the ways that oppression is still happening, the ways that minimization is still happening, that generational trauma is still happening. And We also kind of need to save the planet. The planet is very much on fire. So the big why is very big for me. And that's not, that doesn't represent the views of everybody on my team, because that's part of my nine vision.

The nine vision is huge, and it takes in the whole. And so I wanted to build something that represents a new way of being in the world and a new way of doing work in the world where we can be have fun with it and be, enjoy and not in competition, but share each other's successes and cheer each other on.

And I didn't see enough places where that was happening. Now I'm delighted that I've met you all because you are doing that for so many wonderful women, uh, that need what you do. So, thank you for that.

Passionistas: It's our pleasure and I have to say it was our it was probably the most excited we've ever been about a comment was the day that you posted, I found my people.

Safrianna: Seriously, I mean, I see in your community that people are really talking about the big stuff, and that is not something you see everywhere. And that's why I made my community for like, the nerds and the weirdos and the starseeds and the just like, People, the neurodivergent people who don't know how to socialize, so they don't know where to go, like, we create that safety, um, and a net for people to know that they can just show up, and you're doing that for a lot of visionary leaders who really need to know they're not alone, especially in today's sociopolitical environment.

Passionistas: Yeah. Yeah. No, we, we so respect what you're doing and, and, uh, we we're just so glad that we got connected 'cause it just feels like we were meant, meant to know each other. So, um, we, we really are blown away by what you're doing. Um, is there one lesson that you've learned on your own journey that really sticks with you?

Safrianna: That sacrificing yourself doesn't get you anywhere, and it doesn't get anyone else anywhere either. One of the pieces of wisdom that I distilled over the years of working as a therapist, and then a guide, is compassion does not equal enabling. Letting someone get away with bad behavior because you want to be nice is not compassion.

Compassion respects everyone's boundaries. It lets everyone have a seat at the table. So the most important thing I have learned is to stop martyring myself and giving myself up for everyone else because it didn't help them. And it didn't help me.

Passionistas: So we have, um, one last two part question, which is, what's your dream for yourself?

And what's your dream for women and gender non-conforming, non-binary people?

Safrianna: My dream for myself is to be fully resourced while living a life routed completely in joy. Where I'm great already at honoring the light and the shadow and the, like, the low points, but I would like to just be completely resourced to where some of the everyday worries are gone, and if some of the everyday worries are gone, I'm pretty darn content with where I'm at in my life, because I would just like to be able to write my books.

And tell my stories and know that I'm going to be supported doing that. That's my, my soul's dream is to, like, be the non TERF JK Rowling. Uh, like the, the every little kid out there sees themselves in my stories, or every adult going through something sees themselves in my stories. Like, that's my dream for myself.

My dream for women and gender non-conforming people is that they get to finally feel safe in their bodies someday because that is something that we don't really get to experience presently, is a deep routed, ongoing sense of felt safety in our nervous systems because most of us walk out the door and we have a little bit of nagging worry at the very least.

And that is a reality in our present world. And that really needs to change. So I will hold fast. And part of that is the curing of generational trauma, because our society has been so deeply wounded. So really the big vision of talking about the trauma, clearing it out so that we can all be safe, all of us.

Passionistas: Thanks for listening to The Passionistas Project. Since we're not only business partners, but best friends and real life sisters, we know how unique and truly special our situation is. We know so many solopreneurs, activists, women seeking their purpose and more, who are out there doing it all on their own.

They often tell us they wish they had what we have. So we've created a space for them and you to join our sisterhood, where trust, acceptance, and support are the cornerstones of our community. By joining, you become part of our family. We'll give you all of our sistips on building meaningful relationships through the power of sisterhood and all the tools you need to thrive in three key areas: business growth, personal development and social impact.

You'll learn from our panel of Power Passionistas who are experts on topics like transformational leadership, letting go of perfectionism, the power of community, and so much more. You can connect with likeminded women and gender non-conforming, non-binary people who share your values and goals in chat spaces.

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Until then, stay passionate!